I finally did it. I went the FrankenPre route. I purchased a Pre 2 Unlocked for $250. As soon as it came, I accidentally broke the volume rocker ribbon during conversion.
THANKFULLY HP/Palm replaced the phone under its regular warranty (Thought I lost $250!), and the new one came today.
I was EXTRA careful, and I can say OMG, it is the Pre I wished I had the entire time. Without any added patches, the phone is amazingly fast.
I recommend this to ANYONE in the same situation.
Thank you to WebOS Internals and everyone else!
Only issue - I can't find the Sprint apps (the most current versions) to load back. I've tried the original 1.4.5 WebOS doctor from Sprint, but most of those files do not work well.