View Poll Results: If Chick contacts the AFLAC-Duck: What he's going to say?

Voters
165. You may not vote on this poll
  • Let's meet in my limo at 4PM darlin'

    61 36.97%
  • Let me sleep on it first, Chicky

    13 7.88%
  • You? You low-class farmer chick... Scram!

    58 35.15%
  • Ha?..

    33 20.00%
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  1. #3161  
    Quote Originally Posted by ACDriver
    BTW, I love these kind of questions. They require an understanding of the principles of the universe around you, but don't require that you do friggin' math on your days off.!

    So who's gonna buy a 650? I'm gonna. My wife thinks I am nuts. Well, actually she has come to accept that as my normal condition, but she has added "Smartphones" to the impressive list of evidence supporting her position that I am..... nuts.
    Glad it met with your approval ACD! Much better than all those high-school maths questions eh?

    As for being nuts, simply point out to your current wife that as your wife she is responsible for all your actions and anything you do that the neighbours find odd will reflect badly on her. If she doesn't accept that you need a 650 you will buzz the street with your 747
    Animo et Fide
  2. #3162  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    I think I should get half the prize for finding the formula (attached).
    What did we say the prize was? More gold, silver or bronze fish?
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  3. #3163  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    Do fish come in cappuccino flavor?!
    Only if you find the whole answer, half the prize won't include cappucino flavor...
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  4. #3164  
    Quote Originally Posted by Muziek
    Regarding the adoption papers, Oops. The immigration and naturalization office has asked me to deport you back to Canada But, lucky for you, I work for money. If you come up with $743,300 by next weekend I might be able to work something out with the government. And regarding the "snapping, snapping, snapping" with your Treo: You use that phone in my bedroom one time and I am calling for "Lunatic," my neighbor's Doberman!
    Quote Originally Posted by ChickenNoodles
    We're still splitting the profit 50-50 as agreed, right?
    This is bribery! Where can a street cat find that kind of money? I am not some dictator who stashes away money in Switzerland! (Pun intended, clulup)
    Women…….
    You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing.
    -Michael Pritchard
  5. #3165  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    And to think that Oops forgot to mention your name in his (quite funny) thread's characters post is really unfair.
    Oh, we can't really fault him. He's just a cat; they are easily distracted....
  6. #3166  
    Quote Originally Posted by PeterBrown
    As for being nuts, simply point out to your current wife that as your wife she is responsible for all your actions and anything you do that the neighbours find odd will reflect badly on her. If she doesn't accept that you need a 650 you will buzz the street with your 747
    ACDriver, in case you sometimes get the feeling that the discussions with your wife take unexpected turns, maybe this little guide can be of help:

    "Yes" = No
    "No" = Yes
    "Maybe" = No
    "I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry
    "We need" = I want
    "It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now
    "Do what you want" = You'll pay for this later
    "We need to talk" = I need to complain
    "Sure go ahead" = I don't want you to
    "I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
    "You're so manly" = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
    "Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I have flabby thighs
    "This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house
    "I want new curtains" = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper
    "I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep
    "Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive
    "How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're going to hate
    "I'll be ready in a minute" = Just going to wash my hair
    "You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me
    "Are you listening to me!?" = Too late, you're dead

    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  7. #3167  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    And you seem to have an excellent understanding of those principals...Yea, right...
    Principles Chick, you might want to have a good understanding of the principal but that's a matter for you and your husband to discuss! (freudian slip perhaps?)
    Animo et Fide
  8. #3168  
    Quote Originally Posted by clulup
    ACDriver, in case you sometimes get the feeling that the discussions with your wife take unexpected turns, maybe this little guide can be of help:

    "Yes" = No
    "No" = Yes
    "Maybe" = No
    "I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry
    "We need" = I want
    "It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now
    "Do what you want" = You'll pay for this later
    "We need to talk" = I need to complain
    "Sure go ahead" = I don't want you to
    "I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
    "You're so manly" = You need a shave and you sweat a lot
    "Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I have flabby thighs
    "This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house
    "I want new curtains" = and carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper
    "I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep
    "Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive
    "How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're going to hate
    "I'll be ready in a minute" = Just going to wash my hair
    "You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me
    "Are you listening to me!?" = Too late, you're dead

    Did your wife dictate this to you?
    << My command as we escape Palm HQ with a new Pre 3>>.

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  9. #3169  
    Quote Originally Posted by tjd414
    Did your wife dictate this to you?
    Not at all, but, as PeterBrown pointed out in this post, scientist tend to have a index to ring finger length ratio of 1.00, which is quite close to the ratio women have. Therefore, we are partly able to understand women... to a limited degree, of course, but still.

    This can be a tremendous advantage, I can tell you! Anyway, this is how this little phrasebook was developed (not by me of course!).
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  10. #3170  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    What Chick really think (and if I agreed I wrote "agree.")

    "Yes" = Yes Dear!

    "No" = Maybe

    "Maybe" = Dream on!

    "I'm sorry" = I really am sorry honey.

    "We need" = This is concerning both of us, honey.

    "It's your decision" (not applicable since I never say that

    "Do what you want" = Go ahead kill yourself.

    "We need to talk" = I need to vent

    "Sure go ahead" = Be my guest

    "I'm not upset" = I am just a bit angry

    "You're so manly" = Your fish is so tiny

    "Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I am too skinny

    "This kitchen is so inconvenient" = Let's do it in the den.

    "I want new curtains" = I want a new iBook.

    "I heard a noise" = Snoring can be a sign for heart disease.

    "Do you love me?" = You are not being romantic.

    "How much do you love me?" = Honey, OMG: What happened to your fish?

    "I'll be ready in a minute" = I'm running late again, sorry.

    "You have to learn to communicate" = Why can't men talk?

    "Are you listening to me!?" = Honey, stop admiring your fish...
    ROTFLMAO
    << My command as we escape Palm HQ with a new Pre 3>>.

    Treo 300 >> Treo 600 >> Treo 650 >> Treo 755 >> Instinct >> Pre- >> TouchPad
  11. #3171  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    What Chick really think (and if I agreed I wrote "agree.")
    I noticed you never agreed.... why am I not surprised? Women - they are soooo predictable sometimes....
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  12. #3172  
    Quote Originally Posted by clulup
    Not at all, but, as PeterBrown pointed out in this post, scientist tend to have a index to ring finger length ratio of 1.00, which is quite close to the ratio women have. Therefore, we are partly able to understand women... to a limited degree, of course, but still.

    This can be a tremendous advantage, I can tell you! Anyway, this is how this little phrasebook was developed (not by me of course!).
    My ring finger is longer than my index finger.

    So, let me ask a dumb question. Just what does that mean?
    << My command as we escape Palm HQ with a new Pre 3>>.

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  13. #3173  
    I had quite a novel experience today: Two plainclothes policemen came to our office, showed their ID cards and asked to have a look at our windows. We obviously have a good view of the street below, where pickpockets seem to increase activity in the Christmas shopping season. They are considering placing a camera in one of the offices or on a balcony in order to observe the street below and catch pickpockets red-handed.

    Of course we will give our law enforcement community all the support they need. We suggested placing a Christmas decoration snowman on the balcony in order to disguise the camera. And to place a big sign saying "God sees you" or something on the snowman. Sounds like a fun project!
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  14. #3174  
    Quote Originally Posted by clulup
    I had quite a novel experience today: Two plainclothes policemen came to our office, showed their ID cards and asked to have a look at our windows. We obviously have a good view of the street below, where pickpockets seem to increase activity in the Christmas shopping season. They are considering placing a camera in one of the offices or on a balcony in order to observe the street below and catch pickpockets red-handed.

    Of course we will give our law enforcement community all the support they need. We suggested placing a Christmas decoration snowman on the balcony in order to disguise the camera. And to place a big sign saying "God sees you" or something on the snowman. Sounds like a fun project!
    What does this have to do with my fingers?????????????
    << My command as we escape Palm HQ with a new Pre 3>>.

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  15. #3175  
    Quote Originally Posted by tjd414
    My ring finger is longer than my index finger.

    So, let me ask a dumb question. Just what does that mean?
    That you are Superwoman? Just kidding, I mean, I didn't believe in that report anyway!
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  16. #3176  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    So you are now cooperating with the law enforcement by allowing them to use YOUR space. What's next? The government will place cameras in your offices to spy on your employees? Tulip, I am intricately disappointed in such behavior coming from a very educated man like you.
    Well, at first they wanted to put a sniper there and shoot the pickpockets, but we managed to talk them out of that idea...

    Seriously though, they are nice guys... and we don't want pickpockets to rob pretty blonde tourists, or wealthy elderly ladies, do we?
    “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.” (Philip K. ****)
  17. #3177  
    Hi ACD -- is your divorce final?
    Chickie -- I could have told you that clulesslup is working for the police; he'll do anything for money and fame
  18. #3178  
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    I am not a scientist (thank Gosh) but my answer is probably as scientifically sound as Ph.D.-Tulip's answer will ever be.
    The index finger's ratio to "tallman" finger and "ring" finger is nothing more than an odd mutation in your DNA pool. Take a long shower and a couple of Aspirins and you'll be a new person tomorrow. And meanwhile don't pick your nose with your ring finger
    Would that be a cold shower?

    Don't have a headache, do I still need to take the aspirin? Although, my mischevious mind could take this "headache" thing in a few different directions!!!!

    Ahhh, why can't I?
    << My command as we escape Palm HQ with a new Pre 3>>.

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  19. #3179  
    Quote Originally Posted by Muziek
    Hi ACD -- is your divorce final?
    Chickie -- I could have told you that clulesslup is working for the police; he'll do anything for money and fame
    Not even close Muzie...just got off the phone with her and she pledged her undying love to me once again. Then she asked I could transfer some more money into her checking account.
    "Do the Chickens have large talons?" Napoleon Dynamite
  20. #3180  
    Quote Originally Posted by m00se
    We do the dishes in the hot tub
    A group activity, I like that.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    The thieves will now give the cameras and Tulip the finger!
    Quote Originally Posted by Chick-Dance
    I am not a scientist (thank Gosh) but my answer is probably as scientifically sound as Ph.D.-Tulip's answer will ever be.
    The index finger's ratio to "tallman" finger and "ring" finger is nothing more than an odd mutation in your DNA pool. Take a long shower and a couple of Aspirins and you'll be a new person tomorrow. And meanwhile don't pick your nose with your ring finger
    LOL
    Quote Originally Posted by ACDriver
    Not even close Muzie...just got off the phone with her and she pledged her undying love to me once again. Then she asked I could transfer some more money into her checking account.
    I wasn't in any rush to get married and now I know why....

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