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  1. ospreyguy's Avatar
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       #1  
    So my in-laws are complete asshat-stupid morons. My MIL thinks she's a computer expert because she worked at a Radio Shack in 1980 (when they actually did stuff with the computers) as a cashier. Example of her retardation: she will routinely defrag her computers thinking she is the coolest thing ever. Only to find the malware she installed didn't go away.

    My FIL is a narcissistic jerk who has to have the very best no matter if he has a freaking clue how to use it. If he does anything wrong it's never his fault, either it's your fault that you caused him to do it or it's your fault you mis-understood what he was doing. Examples: 1. Has had an ipod nano sitting in the box for a year and a half because he didn't know how to use it. 2. Cheated on his wife, excuse was the wife wasn't nice enough to him.

    Guess what they just got?! New phones. Did they get a freaking Jitter Bug that fits their skill levels? NO! MIL gets an EVO, we live in FLORIDA, there is no 4G coverage in FL... AND SHE CALLED IT "One of them Google phones." FIL got an HTC Touch pro 2. Yeah, the F-er can't even make a call yet.

    Why am I posting it here? Because I am the tech guy in the family. So I should always know *** is wrong with the crap they buy. FIL called me from a landline to ask how to make a call. MIL wants to know how put music on it.

    And the crowning glory (as if you can't tell) is I hate them. My wife hates them, and we can't stand going over there. But my kids love them, as only kids can, and they are free sitters...

    Take a crowbar to my face, PLEASE!
  2. #2  
    My advice to you: drink heavily; start now.

    Better listen to me; I'm pre-med.

    I am lucky because my wife is not on speaking terms with her parents and they live over 1000 miles away. Essentially, I have no in-laws.
    "Honest to the point of recklessness; self-centered in the extreme."
  3. #3  
    lmao......pre-med....start drinking
  4. TexMexSol's Avatar
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    #4  
    Dude... I feel your pain...
  5. #5  
    Gee, I sure am glad you are not my son-in-law. I would need more than a crowbar. You sound like a real nice guy. LOL!
  6. #6  
    OMFG!!! Take off the in-law part and I'm not kidding - the same story applies here. My parents are married to their blackberries (which they have no CLUE how to use). Every single time we go over to their house, I end up working on their computers and phones fixing whatever they've jacked up on them while my poor wife sits upstairs and talks about how we don't have kids yet to them. My dad - as an attempt to offset the guilt laid down by my mom refers to our dogs as "the kids". What a damn mess. I can't hardly wait to get out there on Friday and see how badly mom's computer is f*'d up. She called, not 5 minutes ago, saying "my computer says I have 20 viruses after I Googled Backgammon rules. Do I click "Scan Now?" *holds head in hands* Best part is - she wants to hold GOOGLE responsible for spreading the Malware...

    I've found that Johnny black label is my ticket to paradise, so darling - you're driving on Friday.
  7. Micael's Avatar
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    #7  
    Now you know why we gave geeky toys to our kids.
    The Law of Logical Argument: Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.
  8. #8  
    my rule is to not own the same tech so I can plead ignorance. If they go droid, I'm goin palm. If they go windows, I'm goin linux, etc. When they call, I can't help. It's easier to use this strategy if you live far enough away so they can't hand it to you to figure out hands on.

    you should be thinking about moving to a cold climate they won't want to visit.

    south dakota, minneapolis, NYC, vermont... That's the new plan!
    Last edited by Workerb33; 07/02/2010 at 04:26 PM.
  9. #9  
    At least they aren't like my mother in law, who every time she visits will randomly walk through the house and unplug the appliances because they are fire hazards.
  10. ospreyguy's Avatar
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       #10  
    Quote Originally Posted by count cellular View Post
    At least they aren't like my mother in law, who every time she visits will randomly walk through the house and unplug the appliances because they are fire hazards.
    Wow that's a good one!
  11. ospreyguy's Avatar
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       #11  
    Quote Originally Posted by JimOhara View Post
    Gee, I sure am glad you are not my son-in-law. I would need more than a crowbar. You sound like a real nice guy. LOL!
    That's the thing, I am a nice guy! So when they call or come over i smile and nod and do what I can. All the while I am choking on the blood from my throughly bitten tongue.
  12. ospreyguy's Avatar
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       #12  
    Quote Originally Posted by Workerb33 View Post
    my rule is to not own the same tech so I can plead ignorance. If they go droid, I'm goin palm. If they go windows, I'm goin linux, etc. When they call, I ca.t help. It's easier to use this strategy if you live far enough away so they can't hand it to you to figure out hands on.

    you should be thinking about moving to a cold climate they won't want to visit.

    south dakota, minneapolis, NYC, vermont... That's the new plan!
    Oh man... If only the wife would play along with my shack in Alaska scheme...
  13. ospreyguy's Avatar
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       #13  
    Quote Originally Posted by kevin.norlander View Post
    OMFG!!! Take off the in-law part and I'm not kidding - the same story applies here. My parents are married to their blackberries (which they have no CLUE how to use). Every single time we go over to their house, I end up working on their computers and phones fixing whatever they've jacked up on them while my poor wife sits upstairs and talks about how we don't have kids yet to them. My dad - as an attempt to offset the guilt laid down by my mom refers to our dogs as "the kids". What a damn mess. I can't hardly wait to get out there on Friday and see how badly mom's computer is f*'d up. She called, not 5 minutes ago, saying "my computer says I have 20 viruses after I Googled Backgammon rules. Do I click "Scan Now?" *holds head in hands* Best part is - she wants to hold GOOGLE responsible for spreading the Malware...

    I've found that Johnny black label is my ticket to paradise, so darling - you're driving on Friday.
    I've got to get into nice scotch. All the beer is killing my gut! (Not that whiskey is better for me...) After each visit I keep moving to higher and higher alcohol content beers that are basically ports...

    Maybe this one is in order... http://www.time.com/time/business/ar...978705,00.html
  14. ospreyguy's Avatar
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       #14  
    Quote Originally Posted by louwiid View Post
    My advice to you: drink heavily; start now.

    Better listen to me; I'm pre-med.

    I am lucky because my wife is not on speaking terms with her parents and they live over 1000 miles away. Essentially, I have no in-laws.
    I hate you and love you at the same time.
  15. #15  
    Quote Originally Posted by ospreyguy View Post
    Oh man... If only the wife would play along with my shack in Alaska scheme...
    Um, that sounds a little too close to being like Ted Kazinski... Moderation will serve you well here.
  16. #16  
    Quote Originally Posted by ospreyguy View Post
    I hate you and love you at the same time.
    BTW, your in-laws are PreCentral members and they have been reading this thread. Next time you visit, keep your back to the wall and keep a clear path of retreat in mind at all times...
  17. dandar's Avatar
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    #17  
    Quote Originally Posted by ospreyguy View Post
    So my in-laws are complete asshat-stupid morons... Yeah, the F-er can't even make a call yet.

    Why am I posting it here? Because I am the tech guy in the family. So I should always know *** is wrong with the crap they buy. FIL called me from a landline to ask how to make a call. MIL wants to know how put music on it.

    And the crowning glory (as if you can't tell) is I hate them. My wife hates them, and we can't stand going over there. But my kids love them, as only kids can, and they are free sitters...
    You're the type of tech guy that probably always feels better/smarter than everyone else My daughter is just three, but I hope she's not gonna end up with a guy like you.

    You have in laws that value your opinion, love and are good to your kids and may have some character flaws. They are also the parents of your wife. Instead of hating them maybe you should show some respect.
  18. #18  
    Quote Originally Posted by dandar View Post
    You're the type of tech guy that probably always feels better/smarter than everyone else My daughter is just three, but I hope she's not gonna end up with a guy like you.

    You have in laws that value your opinion, love and are good to your kids and may have some character flaws. They are also the parents of your wife. Instead of hating them maybe you should show some respect.
    I guess ospreyguy's in-laws ARE on PreCentral!

    Runawaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!
    "Honest to the point of recklessness; self-centered in the extreme."
  19. #19  
    Quote Originally Posted by Workerb33 View Post
    BTW, your in-laws are PreCentral members and they have been reading this thread. Next time you visit, keep your back to the wall and keep a clear path of retreat in mind at all times...
    lol
  20. #20  
    Quote Originally Posted by dandar View Post
    You're the type of tech guy that probably always feels better/smarter than everyone else My daughter is just three, but I hope she's not gonna end up with a guy like you.

    You have in laws that value your opinion, love and are good to your kids and may have some character flaws. They are also the parents of your wife. Instead of hating them maybe you should show some respect.
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