Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 20 of 47
  1.    #1  
    SCOOP!

    Word has just leaked out about some Springboard modules that WON'T be making it to store shelves! Attached are the pics!


    The first one, is of the VaporJam, by (name I cannot pronounce) known here as T-JAM® Industries! The VaporJam was known for it's ability to become a digital camera, and mp3 player, and a cell phone all in ONE EXTRA-ordinary module! (Requires extra T-Jam Chips to do all of the above, sold seperately.) The cool ice color (enhanced by that snazzy blue backdrop) shows just how cool it would have looked. However, the CEO of T-JAM® recently died of a nasty fall down the stairs, and the company has been sold to the makers of low-quality tricycles.


    Pardon my poor graphic editing abilities, I used the most basic paint program on the planet. Got any more? Please reply!

    Hope this lightened y'all up.


    More soon!
    Attached Images Attached Images
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  2.    #2  
    The second, is the SpringPhone™ , which allows for the full annoyance of a Cell phone, without:

    Roaming Charges
    Monthly Bills
    Limited Coverage
    Bulky Size
    High cost!!

    AutoDetect senses when you enter movie theaters, high-class restaraunts, and presidential inagurations, and picks the right ring tone (Bagpipe, High-Shrill, Regular) to get the MAXIMUM annoyance out of your victims!

    However, the SpringPhone was cancelled after the company decided to "focus on networking solutions proactively in a win-win scenario paradigm"

    bummer.


    --
    Attached Images Attached Images
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  3. #3  
    Pretty hilarious. I'd like to see some kind of "vapor-cloud" logo or something (or maybe just a "module made of mist") for the 1st one.
    A riot though ... keep up the good work!
    "Great Spirits Have Always Encountered Violent Opposition From Mediocre Minds." -- Albert Einstein
  4. #4  
    The ***** strike again. Don't you have anything better to do?

    I can't believed I wasted those 20 seconds coming here, and another 10 typing this.
    <body bgcolor="#FFFFFF" text="#000000" id="all" leftmargin="10" topmargin="10" marginwidth="10" marginheight="10" link="#000000" vlink="#000000" alink="#000000">

    <img src="http://www.msnbc.com/d/v/130x100/n_bush_accept_001213.jpg">

    <br><b><font color="#0000FF" size="2">Proudly led by "Dubya"</font></b></center>

    </body>
  5. #5  
    Oh man, that was hilarious

    How but we get these fricken huge images & text out of the sigs? I think thats what the avatars were enabled for people...
    Matt Nichols
    VigoSpraxPalm@Yahoo.com
  6.    #6  
    Well, we all know there are people here who LOVE Sony's garbage. However, many people simply couldn't shell out the money necessary to buy the flimsy "Clie," so Sony ALMOST came out with a solution! The MemoryChip™ adapter, which lets you connect any Sony MemoryStick™ to your Visor! Look at all of these features:::

    •Can't play Mp3's, it only allows for unsupported Media types, and that would only work if your handheld HAD a speaker.

    •Can't run Apps. (Memory protection)

    •Can't store Apps. (Read Only)

    •Can't be accessed by your HandHeld

    •Can't store any sort of HandHeld file (Read Only)

    •Does not allow for MemoryStick expansion options (Camera... uh.... Mp3 player, etc.)

    Sony cancelled it after they ran out of a necessary parts shortages for their PS2, and melted down all of the manufactured MemoryChip™ modules and used them towards the building of that cool retractable cup-holder in the PS2.
    ----
    Submit your own! These are all one images, so you must download it onto your 'puter before cropping/distorting it.


    (Yaz320's mad because he's a Sony loyalist, well, this should cheer him/her/it up!)
    Attached Images Attached Images
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  7. #7  
    Are you sure it's not by Innogear? Now you see it.........
  8. #8  
    These last 2 posts are best of all! Keep 'em comin!
    "Great Spirits Have Always Encountered Violent Opposition From Mediocre Minds." -- Albert Einstein
  9. #9  
    I am in Taiwan, is that true?? I doubt that is a joke. I will ask the friends on TWPUG.
  10. #10  
    Originally posted by bblue
    Well, we all know there are people here who LOVE Sony's garbage. However, many people simply couldn't shell out the money necessary to buy the flimsy "Clie," so Sony ALMOST came out with a solution! The MemoryChip™ adapter, which lets you connect any Sony MemoryStick™ to your Visor! Look at all of these features:::

    •Can't play Mp3's, it only allows for unsupported Media types, and that would only work if your handheld HAD a speaker.

    •Can't run Apps. (Memory protection)

    •Can't store Apps. (Read Only)

    •Can't be accessed by your HandHeld

    •Can't store any sort of HandHeld file (Read Only)

    •Does not allow for MemoryStick expansion options (Camera... uh.... Mp3 player, etc.)

    Sony cancelled it after they ran out of a necessary parts shortages for their PS2, and melted down all of the manufactured MemoryChip™ modules and used them towards the building of that cool retractable cup-holder in the PS2.
    ----
    Submit your own! These are all one images, so you must download it onto your 'puter before cropping/distorting it.


    (Yaz320's mad because he's a Sony loyalist, well, this should cheer him/her/it up!)
    And don't forget to add they are "Digitally Secure" for your convenience.
    "One of the most important things you learn from the internet is that there is no ‘them’ out there. It’s just an awful lot of ‘us’." -- Douglas Adams
  11. #11  
    LOL! Those were hilarious. They were a very good use of 20 seconds if you ask me. Keep up the good work!
    -Vincent
  12. #12  
    Originally posted by bkbk
    These last 2 posts are best of all! Keep 'em comin!
    That ain't nothin'. Another one that got shelved recently was the HandCuffSpring EyeSpyModule. It was designed to auto-detect suspicious criminal-types [i.e., humans], snap their pictures and then upload the pics to local law enforcement on the next HotSync or via wireless modem. From there, the perp could be tracked down and picked up for questioning and taken off the street [without the annoying Miranda or probable cause requirements thanks to a licensing agreement with the AG], where he could not cause further suspicion. It also was to keep stats you could share via IR with other p'noids.
  13. #13  
    More solid gold!
    Jeez, I think we have the makings of a 1st-rate cable access show here somewhere....
    "Great Spirits Have Always Encountered Violent Opposition From Mediocre Minds." -- Albert Einstein
  14.    #14  
    Hehe! I really like that one! Would love to see some pictures!

    The rest of y'all submit some too! NOW! Now I say!

    ----


    My VDX arrived! Woohoo!
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  15.    #15  
    After the brisk popularity of the Visor Edge, Jeff Hawkins™ announced that Handspring would need to expand it's current product line. Supposedly, the marketing dept. took his word wrong, and created the EdgeBoard™ , which would add the look and feel of the Visor Edge ... but nothing more... and only for your Springboard slot.

    But it comes in 3 colors, Blue, Silver, and Red, just like a REAL Visor EDGE, and is made out of high-quality brushed plastique´.


    Jeff Hawkins admitedly said in a private press-conference later that week: "Damn those fools, they are terribly incompetent at what they do! I SAID I wanted one in GREEN , not SILVER!"

    However, it was fully scrapped when HandSpring realized nobody was going to pay $349.00 with a $50.00 mail-in rebate for this module instead of a REAL Visor Edge.
    Attached Images Attached Images
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  16.    #16  
    When the original SoundsGood™ Audio Player came out, it was named after the description of its performance. However, because it was expensive at the time, GOOD TECHNOLOGY™ started working on a more downscale version of it's Mp3 player. The Result? The SoundsBad Audio Player.™ The problem? Such a name would certainly not sell, unless it would use some acronym ala' Sony. (Clie, Vega, Aibo, Vaio? What the hell?) And concerned about it's reputation, Soundsgood spun-off the company BAD TECHNOLOGY™. However, many of it's early buyers were dissapointed when they found out it wasn't good on their Sony™ cards. "When I saw the quality, I immediately thought... BINGO! I'd love a Sony player for my Handspring!" said an anonymous shopper. The company went out of business when they lost too much money disposing of the left earphone peices they had to manually cut off.
    Attached Images Attached Images
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  17. #17  
    I have found out about a "Top Secret" module that has been in development for months now. Seems that Visor owners have been complaining that the modules currently out were innovative and fun - But could you use them in your everyday life? Well this company heard your voices loud and clear!

    Announcing the first Handspring Module your Grandpa could use.



    Last edited by marcerika; 05/07/2001 at 07:14 PM.
  18.    #18  
    Hehehe! Like that one alot!
    <b><font size=1 color=teal>"Sorry about the whole thing about losing your life savings, but that Palmpilot is property of Enron, so please give it back"
  19. #19  
    More very funny stuff.
    "Vedge" gave me an idea, which I'll extemporaneously (today's snappy vocab. word, eh?) expound upon right here and now (Ack, what alliteration, Batman!):
    A stuffed-cabage, maybe, wedged into the back of the Visor.
    (Hey, I'm makin' this up as I go, man, backoff!)
    Uh ... and it ... uh ... turns into a blender and makes vegetable juice?
    Eh ... gee, I'm beginning to think that maybe not everyone has a talent for this...
    "Great Spirits Have Always Encountered Violent Opposition From Mediocre Minds." -- Albert Einstein
  20. #20  
    Are you an FBI agent, CIA operative, or some other member of the Intelligence Community who routinely carries kilobytes of sensitive information inside one's Handspring Visor?

    Be safe, not sorry! Don't let your Visor be caught dead without the Dead-Sure*C-cure™ springboard!

    If your Visor falls into the hands of agents of hostile governments the Dead-Sure*C-cure™ will seal that security breach pronto. The first time they enter an incorrect password into your Visor, they will discover that the Dead-Sure*C-cure™ springboard is a solid block of military grade C-4 plastic explosive!

    Your capture data will be instantly vaporized, along with most of the hostile agent.

    And any attempt to remove the Dead-Sure*C-cure™ will prompt the same rude surprise.

    (The Dead-Sure company will not be held liable for accidents caused by registered users with poor Graffiti skills)
    Last edited by Winchell; 05/12/2001 at 09:23 AM.
Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Posting Permissions